the colorful scraplife

kataku kemarin, semua bisa dijelaskan dengan tulisan tapi kataku hari ini, aku munafik ada rasa yang tak bisa dituliskan dengan kata bagaimanapun juga bercerita pada teman, jika tidak ada kata yang pas untuk ungkapkan dan disinilah mengalir, tiap huruf yang mungkin tak berarti tiap spasi yang tidak ada penjelasan semuanya berputar, lancar seperti roda satu sifat manusia akan selamanya begitu, atau bisa berubah? perlakuan pada setiap manusia lain, bisa berbeda atau akan bisa sama saja? tiap jengkal sikap dan tindakan, bisa sama? bisa. dan itu terjadi. dan itu nyata. dan itu tak terelakan. dan aku terdiam, semematung itu karena tidak siapkan mimik muka sebelumnya setawar itu kata yang meluncur , jika "oh" dan "hm" masih bisa disebut kata ya, semuanya berubah seperti apa yang digariskan-Nya terbaik dari segala yang baik tak pantas titik kecil di semesta ini mengeluh atau bertanya mengapa -senyata apa?

hello! these last 2 weeks were a lil bit  hard for me, because some of teenager's problem. hahaha well yeah dont be too serious facing the condition which you worried a lot. and im not that type of girl who would crying and feeling depressed much just because a not important thing. moreover spending much time too in the corner of bedroom and blank. fix! it is not me. i am me, im a scene, im a dramaqueen. i wont let anyone control me. anycondition also. and finally im here! have just passed those critical 2 weeks and be the happiest person after all. i have decided a thing and will walk through it constantly. and for the other problem which made a miss understanding role between us, i wont clear it gently. it is too late for clearing. the important side is be better. be better for all the next chapter. knowing im wrong, knowing your principle are enough. from you, i learned a lot for respecting other's mind which i couldnt agree every single step. no problem, this exper...

the most fav photo! BPH IME 2013, before going to our last farewell event, Anyer. -tita

das verstehe ich nicht -karunika

What is the worst thing ever? I swear, being trapped in the same hole for twice. Im so sorry for you who is so far away rigth now, because i didnt keep my promise. Remember the time when i asked for your signed?  You wrote in my book 'jadi wanita solehah ya ta'. It was the time when you accept me as your junior, same as the other. Time goes by. We were getting closer suddenly. The time also which separating us beautifully. it needs 'only' a year to let you go and be stranger. And im curse myself for not caring about us again. Here i am. In case not to remember you again, i did my bad. I am playing around, let myself fall and be the weakest girl. No, you dont have to worry about me, like you did last year. I can handle it by myself. Cheerful is my middle name, after chubby exactly. Hahaha. See? I sill can laugh at myself. I dont know why, i wrote this with you as my object. I thought someone who close to me right now is best. But i am to stupid right now. Mayb...

Matahari pun gelap, demi lelah menggelantungi tepat di titik berperasaan Bilamanapun hujan turun tak berperi, deras, deras dan deras lagi Sampai bulan tegak congkak menengadah begitu tinggi Miliaran bintang setitik titik juga enggan pergi demi malam yg mereka agungkan Dimana lagi dilangit ini tempat mentari berhias Siapa lagi ciptaan yang harus mati demi malam yg tak akan berganti Untuk apa lagi pun jika secelah awan beri titik nol dan mentari berparas elok Jikalau semua enggan membuka mata, tutupi kulit dengan acuhnya Jika kenampakan adalah kemenangan, selamat pada bulan demi adanya yg tak jua hilang Terimakasih pada hujan, yg egoisnya mampu ciptakan peluh sadar Berjuanglah untuk bintang demi setianya menemani kepekatan Matahari tak perlu hentakan kepala ke dinding besar atmosfer, pun menangisi hadirnya yg tak termenangi menembus langit ke 7 Mohonkan pada semesta tuk beri teori big bang hadirkan kenyataannya kembali Jika itu perlu mimpi untuk adanya langit yg miliki ...

the next 11th January, i will let someone gone. maybe he's not so important for me because we seldom contact each other. but i know he's the best one that i have ever had. he is older than me about 2 years. he's a religious. he loves his family very much. he has no doubt that someday he will be a man who makes his mom proud. he have studied in mechanical engineering for 1 year but he resigned because his passion in astrophysics. he spent almost 3 years for learning other language. deutchland is his priority. but he failed going to his dreamland cause he got sick. he has maag. acute. and then he tried learning other language. france. yes. he is going to france next month. leaving all the happiness here, will find his passions later. he was 4 years late to study in college, but he will pay for it absolutely. he will never answer if i ask "when will you come back?". because he did not know too. he promised to meet me once before he is gone. im just his little s...